Think back to when you first met. How often did you see each other and what did you talk about? You probably talked a lot about each other. And how is that now?
How much time do you spend together as lovers? Without phones, without television, without children.
Spend time together regularly and talk only about each other.
Don’t talk about the news, work, or the children, but talk to each other about each other. In other words, how much quality time do you spend together?
In many relationships, the time spent together is often shorter and people mainly talk about work, the news, the children, etc. All topics outside of themselves. I also find it striking how many relationships break down early on. Leading to divorce.
I once read a book called Homework Assignments with homework assignments from well-known American therapists.
One of the assignments in this book was to spend at least one hour together as a couple every day and talk to each other about each other. Not about work. Not about the children. Not about the news or other media. About yourselves. About each other, with each other.
We have discovered that what works best for us is to go to the sauna every now and then. There, we can talk in peace and quiet. It has done us and our relationship a lot of good.
Find a place and a regular time to devote attention to each other.
Huiswerk
Opdracht
Boek:
Favorite Counseling
and Therapy Techniques
Howard G. Rosenthal
Published January 20, 2011
by Routledge
Inspirational
Questions
What’s on your mind?
Is there something bothering you that you want to discuss with me?
What do you think would make me happy?
When would I become a better version of myself, both for myself and for others?
